Dear angry vegans,
Something happened online last week that compelled me to write this to you.
You know who you are, the angriest of them all.
I get it, there’s a lot of dickheads in the world that love to stir shit up.
Is it surprising for you, dear angry vegans, to hear that these dickheads find your anger entertaining?
Let me explain the whole situation.
I love being apart of the vegan FaceBook pages. We get to discuss our dilemmas, share recipes, help each other and rate vegan pizza’s. To be accepted into these groups you must go through a full background check. Once approved the administrators call and conduct a phone interview. The questions asked are to ensure that you are actually vegan. They drill you with questions like; ‘Name four vegan documentaries. Name three well known vegans. What does Gary mean to you?’
If successful you will be accepted into the group. A shiny sustainably made ‘V’ pin is mailed to you to wear proudly on your ethically made cotton shirts.
I’m joking, there are no test questions, although there probably should be!
Not long ago, a devious young fellow made it through admin and was accepted into the vegan group. Like a fox in a hen house, he was there to ruffle some feathers.
This fox, lets call him….. Johnno, began wreacking havoc by posting a picture of a whole roasted pig onto the vegan page. His comment to accompany this image went something like, ‘Just thought I’d show you guys what I’m having for dinner, with salads as well of course.’
Cue single consecutive claps for originality.
I was fortunate enough to stumble across this only minutes after being posted, before the post was disabled.
I smiled and thought, ‘Surely no one will take the bait…they’re not that stupid’
Holey shitting shit was I wrong. Johnno had brought the ‘angry’ out in almost all who had seen his post.
A swarm of outraged and offended vegans begun commenting on this picture. They used language and threats that made even me mutter, ‘Jesus’ under my breath a few times.
Now I’m no angel, being in the army I hear a lot of swearing and choice phrases. To be honest a good sixty percent of the swearing does come from my mouth. But what I was about to read was so unexpected. Whilst reading I kept thinking to myself, ‘I can’t believe these people took the bait…’
As I recall some of the comments went something like this;
‘Go die you hillbilly imbred fucking prick’
‘I will find where you live and come and hog tie you and roast you alive you stupid fuck’
‘Admin please take this down’
‘How would you like to be in the pigs place huh?’
‘Are you kidding me? You do not deserve to live’
‘Are you seriously going to eat this you sicko?’
‘Cmon guys don’t respond, admin please take this down’
‘You are fucking worse than Hitler if I ever met you I would stab you to death’
The comments continued until admin eventually took the post down.
I remember reading them, each comment more hateful than the next. I remember feeling angry, ashamed, sad, disappointed and frustrated. Not at Johnno the sly fox, at the vegan community.
Meanwhile, Johnno and his mates are laughing hysterically at the responses. They’re stuffing their faces with roast pig flesh saying things like,
“Holey shit, that chick just said she wants to roast me alive! Bahahahahaha!”
“Mate, these vegans are fucking vicious, what else can we write to really stir them up?”
Dear angry vegans.*Slow sullen headshake*, are you that dumb? Do you not realise that your providing free entertainment for these trolls?
So many people responded in anger so quick, it occurred to me that maybe these angry vegans don’t know what a troll is. Well! Allow me to explain.
Johnno is known to the internet as a troller. Trollers basically go out of their way to find people to get a rouse out of. Unfortunately, vegans are easy targets.
I know first hand what trolls are like, I work with one.
This guy I work with is a self confessed troller. He spends much of his time playing online games and saying nasty things to people in the online world. He doesn’t hide any of what he says or does, sometimes he even gloats about it.
“Oi, I just trolled this bitch hard, I called her a cunt and now she’s left the game.”
He laughs when people get angry. He told me once how he used to sit at home and find people to troll, just for something to do.
When I asked, “So why do you do it?”
“Cause it’s funny as fuck, it’s entertaining.” He replied.
I asked, “So do you ever feel bad?”
He replied, pretending to think for a moment, “Hmmmmm…nup!”
When I said, “Well stay away from the vegan pages okay!”
He replied simply; “Trolling vegans is child’s play…..”
‘CHILDS PLAY’….. as though it’s THAT EASY to troll a vegan, its for amateur trollers.
I’m not a psychologist, I don’t know why people find it humerous and entertaining to upset other people. After all, it takes a particular type of person to be a proper troll. But lets focus on his honest answer…’Cause it’s funny as fuck.’
Trollers find your responses FUNNY my dear angry vegans. They certainly don’t stop and think, ‘Hmm, maybe I am worse than Hitler…’
You are in most cases NOT inciting the trollers to go away and become better people. You are simply giving them what they want and making yourselves and the whole community look bitter and partially insane in the process.
Old Johnno’s gunna take screenshots of these responses and show all of his mates. He will tell stories of how he, ‘Trolled the fuck outta some vegan page.’ His mates will all have a laugh and then the trolling will continue next week when they all get together to eat more whole roasted animals. They’ll start by saying ‘Hey man I got accepted into this vegan group, I’m gunna troll the fuck out them, see how angry they get when I post a pic of this bacon.’
How awesome would it be if Johnno and his mates posted a picture and the only comment was, “Admin, please take this down.”
Oh how sad this would be for Johnno! No angry vegans commenting with colourful language. No death threats. This equals no laughs for Johnno and his mates. No response, no entertainment. Trollers move on pretty quickly if they’re not getting the response they came for.
If we could all just refrain from engaging with the trollers, we would ‘win’.
But alas, it’s not a perfect world.
There will be the outspoken vegans who will not be silenced…angry comments commence.
There will be new vegans who see these trollers and think they can tactfully disgrace these meat eaters…angry comments commence.
There will be long time vegans who have had enough and want to give these heathens a piece of their mind….angry comments commence.
There will be vegans who have had a tough day, who turn to the Facebook community for some solace. They see the trolls post and it’s the last straw…angry comments commence.
There will always be the self righteous vegans who need to let the trollers know exactly what runs through their minds…angry comments commence.
If you are new to veganism like me, or have been vegan a while, are outspoken, self righteous, angry or all of the above….THAT’S GREAT! We need you dear passionate angry vegans! You help spread the vegan message in your own way which someone will resonate with.
I’m not saying to stop being angry or outspoken. Anger can drive people to do great things. Being outspoken can force people to hear the truth they are trying to ignore. We need more of these sorts of people in our community, just smarter ones. Always ask yourself, ‘Is what I’m about to say a useful message to the person I am communicating with?’ Generally if its something along the lines of ‘Go die you meat eating scum your worse than Satan I hope you rot in hell you fucked up excuse for a human’, then it’s not helping anyone.
Yes, being vegans we all have our moments. Lord knows I have wanted to launch at people like a rabid squirrel and tear their face off with my own teeth. But causing an argument when people have no idea where your coming from is pointless. Try to educate, rather than argue.
My anger coping strategies.
Try not to let these frustrations out on the meat eaters. They just don’t understand. Most of us have been in the others shoes and we seem to forget this.
Anyways, focusing on the trollers, just stop being angry at these people who genuinely find your anger funny. Please don’t be that stupid!
Please feel free to leave comments and your opinions!
How do you think vegans should respond to trolls if at all?
Have you ever been trolled or maybe you are the troller?
Have you had moments where YOU have been an angry vegan?